What Are The Characteristics Of A Godly Man
When I first accepted the calling to leave education (after 26 years) and lead men rather than teach children and train teachers, I thought God made a mistake. Because I had several concerns:
Don’t you have to LIKE men in order to lead men?
Don’t you have to be a successful man in order to lead men successfully?
Don’t you have to be example of a godly man in order to lead men?
How do you lead men if you don’t know what a godly man is?
I thought my life’s story and mistake-prone past disqualified me from being a leader of men. I didn’t know a thing about being a man, let alone, how to be a godly man.
The Truth Is The Characteristics of a Godly Father Were Never Shown To Me
The track record of men in my life hardened my heart towards men. Like most boys who grew up in an inner-city ghetto like me, were either abandoned by their fathers, angry at their fathers, emotionally detached from their fathers, abused by their fathers or another man, or rejected by their fathers. That was me.
Having grown up in the church, I wanted to be a godly man, but I had no clue how to be one. So, like most young boys, who grow up without a father, or grow up with the wrong father, I set out to NOT become the kind of man, father, and husband my dad was.
But I quickly learned a valuable lesson in life, you can’t get to where you want to be trying to avoid where you don’t want to go. That’s the equivalent of wanting to drive from Florida to New York, trying to avoid California. Yeah, you may or may not make it, but trust me, even if you do, it’s probably going to take you a lot longer than you want to get there.
Because of my lack of direction, and misguided motives to become a godly man, I eventually took the scenic route to manhood, going from RAGS to RICHES to RUINED to REDEMPTION; and instead of reaching manhood by 18, it took me until I was 38.
That was when I met a man named Howard Mintz, a husband and father of 8, who came into my life and discipled, mentored, and coached me on how to be a godly man. And the way he did it was exactly the way we, as Christian men, should all do it; not by teaching men to follow and imitate us, but rather by pointing us to the perfect model of manhood, Jesus Christ, as we follow and imitate Him.
Godly Men Characteristics As Shared Through God
Jesus commanded us in Matthew 28:18-19 - “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
In other words, Jesus was the blueprint of manhood we were supposed to follow.
This should be wonderful news for all of us who desire to be godly men, but either grew up without a dad in the home, like me, or who were spiritually and emotionally disconnected from their dad in the home.
Because even though it’s nearly impossible to become something you’ve never seen modeled for you, whether it be a godly husband, godly father, or godly man, it’s NOT impossible to find someone who has been properly and successfully discipled and has been a faithful follower and imitator of Christ. Because Christ was the blueprint.
Ephesians 5:1-2 says, “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”
And Jesus told us himself in John 13:34-35 – “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
So simply put, if you want to learn how to be a godly man, then study the words and life of Jesus Christ, then pray for, look for, and connect to godly men who are faithfully following and imitating Him and His ways. That man or group of men don’t have to perfect, just faithful.
But in order to pray for, look for, and connect to godly men who are true disciples of Jesus Christ, you need to know exactly what you’re looking for in such men. So, that means you must go back and study the original blueprint of the perfect man, Jesus.
As a leader of a Christian men’s organization, Real Men Connect, we’ve helped hundreds, if not over a thousand, men understand four (4) basic character traits of manhood that Jesus demonstrated during his ministry.
I’m sure there are a lot more than four, but I look at these as the four foundational pillars of a godly man that Jesus effectively demonstrated during his lifetime and his ministry.
Four Pillars of Godly Men
How To Be A Godly Man , Pillar 1
The first is, Jesus demonstrated that a godly man leads his family spiritually. He’s not passive in his approach to leadership; he boldly takes initiative as a spiritual leader.
Although Jesus didn’t have a wife or children, he did have a family; and I’m not talking just about his biological family. He had his disciples – who he hand-picked. And he intentionally and deliberately attached himself to them by doing life together with them for three years.
Jesus walked with them, talked with them, prayed with them, ate with them, served with them, laughed with them, and cried with them. He called them “his friends,” but at the same time, there was no mistake that Jesus felt responsible for leading them as a “good shepherd.”
If we expect to be godly men, we need to be intentional about stepping up and into our role as the spiritual leader of our families. And we should expect that God will hold us accountable for that leadership.
If you have no idea where to start in spiritually leading your family, then pray for, look for, and connect to man (or men) who are faithfully doing it already. Or simply contact our organization and we can help you (realmenconnect@gmail.com).
How To Be A Godly Man , Pillar 2
The second thing Jesus did to demonstrate biblical manhood was he loved and served others sacrificially. He put the needs of God and others above his own. This goes hand in hand with the tenets of spiritual leadership.
Check out what these four scriptures say about the sacrificial love of God, as demonstrated through His Son, Jesus Christ:
John 15:13 – “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.”
Romans 5:8 – “But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
John 3:16 - “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.”
1 John 3:16 – “By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.”
No, we’re not saviors, there’s only one – Jesus Christ. But Jesus demonstrated to his disciples (and to us) that biblical manhood is about putting God’s agenda and the needs of man above our own. And the best place to start is in our own family.
How To Be A Godly Man , Pillar 3
The third thing Jesus did, that most of his disciples didn’t even notice, was he was leaving an eternal legacy of faith. Jesus was always focusing the eternal, not temporal; the things of God, not the things of man; kingdom concerns, not earthly matters.
In other words, Jesus showed that a biblical, godly man is a generational man, not a situational man. Everything we do, whether spiritually leading our families or loving and serving others sacrificially, we should always be doing it for and to the glory of God. It’s ultimately about building His kingdom, not our own.
During his time with the disciples, Jesus often discussed and described to them what Heaven was going to be like. He constantly wanted to change the perspective of his disciples by getting them to see things, the world, and people from the God’s heavenly perspective, not just their limited earthly one.
By teaching his disciples how to “see things” differently, Jesus knew they would, ultimately, pass this perspective down to the generations who would eventually read about and follow him and his teachings.
How To Be A Godly Man , Pillar 4
Which leads the to the fourth thing Jesus did, he taught men how to do the three other things I previously mentioned. Jesus intentionally, deliberately, and faithfully taught his disciples how to do the same things he was doing himself.
In other words, Jesus wanted his men to know that godly men multiply by teaching, mentoring, and discipling others; he teaches other men how to spiritually lead their families, how to love and serve others sacrificially, and how to leave an eternal legacy of faith.
Jesus not only did life with his disciples, but he also TAUGHT them how to follow God, lead others, fast and pray, work, serve, forgive others, sacrifice for others, and love others. And in his last words to the disciples, after his resurrection, Jesus commanded them to go out a make even more disciples.
Of course, I’m sure there are many more lessons we can learn about how to be a godly man from the life of Jesus, but these four basic things are a great place for any man to start.
And as I mentioned earlier, if you’re having trouble finding men who are faithfully leading their families spiritually, loving others sacrificially, leaving an eternal legacy, and teaching others how to do the same, then reach out to our organization, Real Men Connect (realmenconnect@gmail.com), and let us help you.
The truth is, being a godly man is an ongoing journey of growth, humility, and devotion to God. It’s about striving to embody and imitate the character of Christ in your daily life, leading with love, integrity, and faithfulness. While the path may not always be easy, the rewards of living a life that honors God are immeasurable.
By seeking God’s guidance, staying rooted in His Word, and surrounding yourself with a supportive community, you can continue to grow in godliness and become the man God created you to be. Embrace this calling with courage and commitment, knowing that your efforts will not only shape your own life but also inspire and bless those around you for generations to come.
Are you stuck? Want to get your faith, marriage, family, career and finances back on track? Then maybe it’s time you got a coach. Every CHAMPION has one. Schedule an appointment to chat with Dr. Joe on how we can help you spiritually love and lead your family better and become the hero of your home.
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